Shaping and molding young minds

Two tales of the emergent political consciousness of l'il wobs.

Tale One: L'il wobs is currently enrolled in a hippy-dippy kind of Christian Montessori school. The boy apparently enjoys the religious part of the curriculum, which is fine by us, albeit a little jarring at times (for instance, when he referred to our wine as "Jesus blood." The way we see it, he'll encounter Christianity at some point - better from people who are teaching him to love everyone than from, say... Baptists. Besides, how's he ever going to appreciate Milton if he doesn't get some Judeo-Christian learning?

At any rate, a few weeks ago, l'il wobs started talking about "Rock" Obama. I was curious to know what the lad knew about "Rock," so I asked him. We were told that Obama is very beautiful, that he was put in jail, and then they killed him.

We were obviously a little surprised by his answer. Either ms. wobs or I asked him if maybe he was talking about Jesus, and l'il wobs responded, "They're the same."

Tale Two: One of l'il wobs friends and his parents weren't able to make the baseball game today, so they offered their tickets to us. We trekked down to watch the Nationals take on the Pirates. All was going well until "Star-Spangled Banner" time. To add a little razzle-dazzle to the proceedings, fireworks are launched to punctuate the "rockets red glare, the bombs bursting in air."

L'il wobs hates loud fireworks and immediately broke down and wanted to leave. We talked our way through it, and he eventually re-settled and started to have a good time, charming our seatmates and munching on (four fucking dollar) Cracker Jacks.

During the bottom of the fourth, however, an Aaron Boone shot to the patio in center field brought out another round of celebratory fireworks, upon which l'il wobs recommenced freaking out. He was talked back down again, but by the time the sixth inning rolled around, he was pretty adamant about going home.

At any rate, when l'il wobs grows up to detest America, you'll know who to blame.

Blinded me with science

Well, that does it. With "scientific" proof like this, how can we deny it? I'll be seeing you in the pews, motherfuckers!

At this point, I believe the kids say, "Boom!"

Answer me this

Really. WTF is going on with all of these Hollywood Scientologists? Why actors? Why not Presbyterianism?

Seriously, WTF is up with that?

Gettin' in on the Jesus talk

Maybe it's the fact that baby Jesus day is approaching, or that pattyjoe has been prodding and prodding and prodding about the nature of Jesus, or that religious wingnuts are once again sucking the oxygen out of presidential politics, but it's got me all thinking about spirituality again.

I always feel like an odd duck when the topic arises. On the one hand, I'm profoundly disturbed by the poohbahs of organized religion, which looks to me (with a few notable exceptions) more like hucksters trying to fleece financial or political power from people who are rightly concerned with grand questions about the meaning of life. I particularly despise how certain religious groups place fealty to culturally produced texts above empirical reality. On the other hand, I do have a sense, a belief, if you will, in some sort of transcendent consciousness (call it what you will). I'd go so far as to say that for fleeting moments I've felt that consciousness. I've never felt that this belief in a transcendent force ever came into conflict with the rationally derived realities I've come to accept as shaping the natural and social world we inhabit.

At any rate, I'm drawn to thinkers who seek to negotiate the tensions between our understanding of the physical and metaphysical in a manner which enlarges our understanding of both rather than foreclosing investigation into one realm because of the primacy of the other. In this vein, I'd recommend to you this interview with Catholic theologian John Haught of Georgetown University where he grapples with many of these questions. Haught testified in the court case over intelligent design being taught in public schools in Dover, PA, rightly stating that it had no place in science classes or in public education.

Anxiously awaiting "world's wackiest encyclicals"

It's bound to happen - when any holy man can issue a religious edict, something really bizarre [via] is sure to slip through. Of course, that's not to say that a religion with a central controlling authority can be any less fucked up.

Christians who say fuck

via the General



Just when you thought that the traditionalist conservatism of the American right couldn't get any more hyper-masculinized, some loud-mouthed jackass with the right connections comes along to up the ante:

The strobe lights pulse and the air vibrates to a killer rock beat. Giant screens show mayhem and gross-out pranks: a car wreck, a sucker punch, a flabby (and naked) rear end, sealed with duct tape.

Brad Stine runs onstage in ripped blue jeans, his shirt untucked, his long hair shaggy. He's a stand-up comic by trade, but he's here today as an evangelist, on a mission to build up a new Christian man -- one profanity at a time. "It's the wuss-ification of America that's getting us!" screeches Stine, 46.

A moment later he adds a fervent: "Thank you, Lord, for our testosterone!"

It's an apt anthem for a contrarian movement gaining momentum on the fringes of Christianity. In daybreak fraternity meetings and weekend paintball wars, in wilderness retreats and X-rated chats about lust, thousands of Christian men are reaching for more forceful, more rugged expressions of their faith.

Wow. I don't know that I want to think about thousands of Christian men reaching for more forceful, more rugged expressions of their faith during an X-rated chat.

Reactionary assertions of "traditional" hegemonic masculinities were once a side interest of mine in my former profession, and they still fascinate me in their increasingly bizarre methods of attempting to re-establish and re-legitimate gendered relationships which rely upon the assertion of brute (masculine) force. This particular iteration contends that Jesus was pretty much a bad-ass motherfucker:

So what's with the standard portraits of Jesus: pale face, beatific smile, lapful of lambs?

"He's been domesticated," says Roland Martinson, a professor of ministry at Luther Seminary in St. Paul, Minn. "He's portrayed now as gentle, loving, kind, rather than as a full-bodied person who kicked over tables in the temple, spent 40 days in the wilderness wrestling with his identity and with God, hung out with the guys in the street. The rough-hewn edges and courage ... got lopped off."

Leaving aside the obvious problems of identifying Jesus's biblical fortitude as inherently masculine and "wild", I think it's a fair critique to say that some mainstream churches present the Gospels in a manner which encourages an obsequiousness to power. The story of Jesus can easily be read as a narrative encouraging action against injustice, as a rallying cry to take the stand up on behalf of the oppressed.

We know, however, that that's not the message that is being taken from these non-wussy Christian retreats:

[S]ome men at the conference run into trouble when they debut their new attitudes at home. Eric Miller, a construction worker, admits his wife is none too pleased when he takes off, alone, on a weekend camping trip a few weeks after the GodMen conference this fall.

"She was a little bit leery of it, as we have an infant," he reports. "She said, `I need your help around here.' "

Miller, 26, refuses to yield: "I am supposed to be the leader of the family."

Just so we're clear: Jesus fasted for forty days in the wilderness, fucked shit up in the Temple, and hung out with lepers and hos. This entitles Eric Miller to leave his wife and newborn child for two weekends - one for his Christian he-man circle jerk, and one for his "weekend camping trip" (where I'm sure he'll be reaching for a more forceful, more rugged expression of his faith). Yeah, his wife says she needs his help, but by the grace of God - his awesome, awesome fucking God - he's the leader of this family and he's going to go camping anyways. That's the way Jesus would've wanted it, dude.

In-your-face aggression at first troubles Howard Stephenson, who paid $68 for a day at GodMen in hopes of forging friendships with other Christian men. When Stine, a born-again Christian, shouts that it's OK to cuss -- and then demonstrates with a defiant "bull ..." -- Stephenson shifts uneasily.

"This is so extreme for me," he says. A few weeks later, Stephenson, 43, is still not sold on profanity. But he has ditched the nice-guy reflex of always turning the other cheek. When he spots a Wal-Mart clerk writing "Happy Holidays" on a window, he boldly complains: It should say "Merry Christmas."

The clerk erases the offending greeting. Chalk one up for Christian testosterone.

"I wouldn't have done that before," Stephenson says proudly. "I am no longer a doormat."

Nope, you're no longer a doormat, having gone the real man route of telling a minimum-wage worker with no health insurance (probably a woman, probably a minority) that you'll have none of that godless liberalism at your local low-wage, cheap-plastic emporium. It must feel good to fight back against such relentless persecution suffered at the hands of the Walton family.

The hostility that barely lies beneath the surface of this particular group creeps me out. And boy do I feel bad for the women who are unlucky enough to find themselves around guys who buy in to this horseshit.

Consecrate the market

Second Amendment? Or Second Commandment?

The New Yorker has a nice read on the Bible publishing industry in the United States. This bit jumped out at me as indicative of the 30 percenters' mindsets:

Different kinds of packaging can always be seen by true believers as having an evangelical utility. If it helps reach people with the Word, then it’s not bad. You can consecrate the market.

I think it's safe to say that this same crowd would agree that spreading the Word through politics and public policy is the consecration of the State, or some other such nonsense. It's easy to feel good about getting rich and wielding power when it's done in the service of God. It also becomes particularly easy to portray anyone who crosses a crusading evangelical as anti-God, or worse...

What really bothers me is that "the word" being spread in some of these re-packaged devotional Bibles will be interpretive essays pushing a certain political agenda. I have no problem with the Bible itself - it doesn't surprise me that 91% of American homes have a Bible laying around somewhere, and there's something to be learned by reading it.

There's also something to be said about knowing the history of the Bible, and the politics behind translations. The cavalier target-marketing approach to biblical curatorship espoused by Southerners who think capitalism is a Divine Tool by which they'll spread the word to each and every soul (with the help of the Christian States of America (CSA) Army) does not make me trust their devotional biblical "product."

You tell me

Did they even read my blog before they e-mailed me?

Dear blog author:

We recently came across your site, medullanoodle.blogspot.com, while searching for fellow christian bloggers.

A small group of us have started a new site called Christian Bloggers. Our prayer and intent is to bring Christians closer together, and make a positive contribution to the Internet community. While many of us have different "theologies", we all share one true saviour.

Would you be interested in joining Christian Bloggers? Please take a few minutes to have a look at what we are trying to do, and if you are interested, there is a sign up page to get the ball rolling. We would greatly appreciate your support in this endeavour.

May God Bless you and your blogging efforts. We look forward to hearing from you.