The case against an American aristocracy

Exhibit B: still at Paris Hilton's 26th birthday party, but surprisingly, only tangentially related to Hilton herself:

Oil heir, noted wordsmith, and parachute enthusiast Brandon Davis made Paris Hilton cry at her 26th birthday party, and drove Courtney Love and Paula Abdul to flee the premises.

Things were going well at Hilton’s dinner party at L.A.’s Prime Grill until 10 p.m. rolled around and Davis started acting up.

"He was hurling flowers at Paula Abdul," a guest tells the New York Daily News. "Then he began bombing her with Styrofoam flower-holders. He was shouting, 'Lick my [BLEEP], Paula!' He started mocking her ancestry by speaking gibberish in an Arabic accent.

Abdul, who was supposed to sing "Happy Birthday," made an early exit.

Davis then turned on Love.

"He lifted her up so that she was straddling his waist," says a witness. "Her Chanel dress was riding up. Brandon was saying, 'I want to squirt on you.' He was humping Courtney in front of her daughter, Frances Bean. When he put her down, Courtney grabbed Frances and they marched out of the restaurant through the kitchen."

Behold our betters. They deserve every penny they have.