What the Google™ corporation tells me is cute

You may have thought I'd be tempted to post more pictures of l'il wobs, or at least kittens and puppies, when I promised you more cute. Instead, I've decided to let the algorithm alchemists at Google divine what "the people" have deemed as "cute."

Your basic web search leads us to cuteoverload.com, where I'm sure none of us are surprised to find this:


Have you ever heard a pug breathe? They sound like a 33 1/3 Darth Vader played at 78 rpm. But I digress.

Keeping in mind that Google is the voice of "the people," and "the people" don't necessarily speak for this particular blogger, the images search inexplicably spits this out first:


This pose is titled "cute stance 6," and I'm afraid it's all that's available to aspiring 13 year-old perverts who have yet to figure out how to circumvent the parental controls on the internet. But really, cute? I would've figured we'd see this


this


this


or even this


before creepy tattooed cyber-fantasy girl showed up in the rankings. But I am a naïf when it comes to the tastes and fancies of "the people."

A search of Google's video database turns up this paean to the pika:



I think we can all agree that the cheery British voice-over adds an extra charm to the pika's cuteness. But all kidding aside, do we dare see what Google News has to tell us is the number one hit for cute today?... Oh, we dare!

Cheeta Charlie, Molly the Second and Cotton Candy arrived in Marlborough Oct. 10, complete with a birth certificate and a parent to welcome them.

Best of all, the new kids on the block, stuffed bears, kittens, dogs and bunnies, were hand-picked by their "parent", making them a perfect match for each other.

Google news delivers! "The people" have spoken!